A Fan's Tribute to Transmetropolitan's Fan Tribute to Hunter S. Thompson

Hey! Hey you! Hey, Transmet! I love you.

I LOVE YOU, COMIC BOOOOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At the Emerald City Comic Con a few years ago a buddy introduced me to Transmet's illustrator Darick Robertson (who is awesome) who totally knew what I meant when I said that Spider Jerusalem is arguably the best "Hunter Figure" in modern art/literature/whatever, and he saw where I was coming from, and we shot the breeze about Hunter S. Thompson for a while and it was cool.

So to me, Transmetropolitan is the best Hunter S. Thompson fan tribute of all time.

Let's fetch the old man off of the Owl Ranch, give him wiry good health, make his series of world-weary foxy assistants into proper superheroes, and make Gonzo journalism less about being too inebriated and fucked up on drugs to write about much more than a savvy person's political feelings and social anxiety, and more about punching injustice in the face repeatedly until real, concrete facts get journalistically recorded accurately, and broadcast to a public who all respond to the words-on-fire with passionate, political action. And then at the end? Nah. Not like what really happened in real life. Let's rewrite that, too.

So, Hunter Thompson terrorized cats more viciously than he terrorized his assistants? Fuck that! Let's give him a cat sidekick. An indestructible cat with two heads that don't give a fuck. Right? Right.

We'll keep the "trademark sunglasses" angle, but instead of mirrored aviators, let's go with something more sci-fi, a little more early-punk-rock. Good deal. While we're at it, why not tattoos? Seems like a good idea.

Alright, we set? Good!

Let's fight corruption with the humor-tempered anti-riot politics of the Dead Kennedys, promote cross-cultural inclusiveness, and really just do our best to live up to those inspirational speeches about civic decency that Henry Rollins has been doing lately.

What do we want?!? Punk rock!!! When do we want it?!? Constantly!!! When do we really want it? When we want our gonzo-feminist-cat-lover-fan-of-Hunter-S-Thompson-guilt softened enough to go as Raoul Duke for Halloween! Or "Halloween!" Also known as "Wednesday!" Or right now! Or whenever. What's a calendar even mean, outside of work hours?

("Why not every day? Are you so afraid? What would people say?")

So thank you, Transmetropolitan. Thank you for telling me exactly what I want to hear.

Well, except for the eating of cute puppy dogs. That's an aesthetically understandable creative choice on Warren Ellis's part. Gotta make it edgy and brutal, but still keep the violence surreal enough to emotionally compartmentalize it enough. But it's still not PERFECTLY my own personal taste, as I am the reluctant babysitter of a revolving series of border collies, and therefore an obligatory--though resentful--Protector Of Dogs.

But it's still a good start.

I'll take what I can get.